gummibat

I used to hate them, the raised white lines along my skin. They proved that I have lost, failed, given in. I used to hide them, under black cloth with little visibility. I felt scared, out of control, beyond safety. Looking back now, I can see them in a new light. They prove I can survive, endure, fight. Looking back now, I know how beautiful I am within. I feel empowered, strong, driven. Here I am, defying the pain that was all I knew. I KNOW in my heart that you can too.

Your warmth draws me closer with each breathe I take, as you flicker around me, all I know is at stake. So inviting, you're smiling, and the flame starts to grow, but something in my heart is telling me to go. Closer and closer, the heat's rising fast, this wonder, this thrill isn't meant to last. The flame hits my skin as I pull back, self control has always been something I lack. You are always so safe from far away, I wish more than anything that I could stay. But you burn me, you burn me, and you don't even see. It will never work, my unattainable dream.

I am blinded. The faces I hold close tell me their sweet words, and I must push them away. I can't believe them. I, too, have a mirror and I see a skewed reflection. But seeing is believing, so I am stuck here, in disbelief, wishing I could see someone else, wishing I could see what they see in me. Every golden word that escapes their lips, I meet with choked back silence. I want it to be real. I want to take myself in, and smooth over the rough surfaces. I need to be able to touch, and to accept. I secretly know, I will never perfect it, but the empty dream is filled with desire, wanting to be better than my current state

Take it, and walk out of the store. Don't pay, just walk. Come on, just once. You won't get caught. Take it, and light it. Don't panic, just breathe in. Come on, just once. It won't hurt you. Take it, and slice across your skin. Focus on the pain, be calm. Come on, just once. You will feel better. Take it, and inject. Feel the rush, smile. Come on, just once. You won't get hooked, I promise. Take it, and thrust in. Close your eyes, feel the body heat. Come on, just once. No worries, I'll be careful. Take it, and throw it up. Just watch, you will get thinner. Come on, just once. You do want to be skinny, right? You said

She used to cry so much that her cheeks had permanent streaks. Kind of like a doll with paint dripping down her porcelain. So, so fucking fragile... that people were afraid to reach out to her. What if she broke on their watch? No one wants that kind of responsibility. So they left her there, alone. And watched her paint dry. She wasn't happy. She couldn't be happy. The porcelain girl started to realize that no one gave a damn. She grew bitter. The soft parts of her that used to hurt were drizzled over with a new metal defense. Nothing, not a single blade could cut through. The metal was thick, and there was no longer any way of reaching her

I used to laugh as I lit the match, Saying how I knew I was messed up. I knew it was wrong, But, I didn't even care. I used to smile, Taking off my clothes, And knowing I was worthless, And knowing it didn't matter to me. I used to be silent, When people told me I was great, Told me they loved me, And I didn't believe them. I told everyone to shut up. I told everyone I was going to change. I told everyone whatever the fuck they wanted. I told lies. And suddenly, The matches burn, And the smoke Has made it very hard to breathe. And suddenly, Going from girl to girl Without caring at all Hurts more than I could have ever

You know what you are? You're heroin. I scrape together everything I have, And give it all to you, With nothing in return… Except the best feeling in the world, And then that low, empty feeling. I got addicted after one use, And all I can think about, Everything I crave is you. Day or night, In my dreams, in my thoughts… Just you. You don't care for me. You spread around to whoever you please. You do what you want, And that is why you are so… Deadly. I know you're an overdose waiting to happen, BUT I can't stop, Even if I wanted to. Which I kind of do, But I really don't at the same time. I know you are b

You have the timing just right, And you've picked the best background. We were under a tree, Spring has just awaken itself. The air was soft, almost like an angel had chosen to breathe life into all that was around. It was all tranquil. Everything was new, unstained. You took the picture. The portrait rests upon your dresser. You've picked the best spot for it. The sun's light floods in, From half-closed shades. The picture is illuminated, shining. Summer has broken through the pale canvas of the previous season. Passion is burning. Everything is vibrant, full. All we can do is smile. The ink isn't as bright as before. It

There is an oasis sprinkled among the sky, and paved into every crack of this broken street. There is real magic carved into the roots of these trees, and ingrained in every blade of grass you walk upon. The emptiness you feel is an illusion, for all you could ever need to fill you is right here at your disposal. So step away from this screen. Step out of these closed walls that surround you. You are not imprisoned, so free yourself! Let nothing stop you. Take charge. I dare you to move. I dare you to dream. I dare you to discover. I. Dare. You. To. LIVE! What are you waiting for?

My heart isn't whole, More like in pieces. That doesn't make me some whore, Struck with diseases. It just means I'm indecisive, That I can't pick one direction. It all sounds so good, My shady confession. I don't know what I want, So don't try and ask. Picking angels from ashes Is not a simple task. I had what I wanted once, She was such a beauty. I was too misled to keep her, I couldn't love her back as truly. Now, I don't think I would know If I found what I am looking for. I pass each chance too quickly, Walking away from open doors. I'm just too… Moody, Reckless, Confused, Senseless. And as the pieces scatte